Uncle Dinny Story

I just saw a reference to Tip O’Neill and Ronald Reagan exchanging Irish jokes over Irish coffee after 5:00 pm. That reminded me of this one. It’s an “Uncle Dinny” story about Dinny McGonicle, similar to the Ole and Sven stories of Minnesota fame:

While working as a longshoreman, Dinny, drunk as usual, fell off the dock and drowned. The union man went to his wake to see Mrs. McGonicle who was sitting with her friend Celia Brady.

“I know Dinny has given you a lot of trouble, Mrs. McGonicle,” the union man said, “him being a drinking man and all. But we all liked him on the docks, and we’ve taken up a collection for him. Here’s a check for $5,000.”

“Glory be to God, Celia,” Mrs. McGonicle said. “Can you imagine that? Why, he never had two nickels to rub together. He couldn’t hold a job. Couldn’t write. Couldn’t read.”

“Thank God,” Celia rejoined, “he couldn’t swim.”